A second heuristic to live by is don’t make excuses.
Is there a difference between an excuse and an explanation? Yes. The difference is we know when we’re making excuses for dumb behavior, indignant attitudes, negligent forgetfulness or downright indifference.
I was 22, fresh out of college just beginning the navigation of the uncertain world of business, when I had gone to hear a motivational speaker. What he said resonated with me: “Whatever is easy to do is even easier not to do.” To this day that simple phrase still resonates with me. It resonates so much so that I apply it towards my pursuit of an orderly way of life. This straightforward {daily} reminder is practical, reasonable, rational and logical.
I took that charge a step further by attaching “don’t make excuses” to it.
I encourage you to be SO mindful of the things that you say you’ll do that if you don’t do them you’ll be forced to come up with a litany of tired, lame excuses for the lack of integrity you’ve shown (integrity in the form of misalignment) of not doing whatever you said you’d do.
When we get in full-blown excuse-making mode, it puts us on our heels in a defensive, combative position ready to die on the hill. Gosh, what a lot of energy expended. Tiring.
Now, I’m not saying you should care what others think about you, because you shouldn’t. BUT, if you truly don’t care that others may see you as flaky, inconsistent, waffling or unreliable (all of which are usually accompanied with a bunch of whiny excuses), then that’s 100% your prerogative and you’re at least consistent with not caring what others think about you.
So, good for you.
I, on the other hand, very much strive towards being viewed as measured, sensible, steady and reliable resulting in less, if any, excuses for anything. These are attributes I HOPE others see in me, whether I actually care what they think or not.
Okay, so, it’s important to note before I get accused of “virtue-signaling,” I am very much guilty of internal grumbling, exasperated sighs, furled brows and teeth grinding. I have to bite my tongue often. I may not be audibly complaining, but my body language and internal dialogue sure is. I try to be very conscientious of this lean and immediately enact a discipline of replacing the urge to grumble with a sense of duty, joy and purpose. I’m not successful all the time, but I’m successful more times than I’m not.
Just remember two things: 1) whatever is easy to do, is waaaay easier not to do especially when you have a bunch of dumb excuses to fall back on, and 2) excuses are like, um, well, you know, and they all stink!
Read the links to the other Healthy Heuristics here: don’t worry and don’t complain.
